Autobiography of Adhyatma Ratna C N Guruswami Sarma, Kumbakonam - Chapter 4- Early Memories at Madurai

AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF
ADHYATMA RATNA KUMBAKONAM C N GURUSWAMI SARMA (1900-1968)
CHAPTER 4

MY EARLY MEMORIES AT MADURAI

Looking back, I vaguely remember the big house. In Menkattu pottal, it was the last house on the southern row facing north towards the great temple which even today shines majestically  in the centre of that ancient town. (The probable location of the house has been given with Google map in the chapter 3-Ed-location of the house.) The front was enclosed by iron rods with a gate to be locked from inside. I was not interested in many things being too young then and I remember my accompanying my sister Rajammal (the third daughter in the house who might have been eight or nine by that time- Ed) and her girl friends to the Theosophical Hall (Brahma Gnana Sabha) at Sandaippet Street where the girls were schooled. (Most probably this school is presently so called Government Girls High school Kansa mettu street about 100 m away from Menkattupottal see link to map- from menkattu pottal to Girls school Ed) . 

One evening when we returned the house was latched from inside and nobody seem to open it in spite of yackings and roars. The girls took me on their shoulders and over the iron rods I was dropped inside and I opened the latch and let them in. I thought it was a grand act and the girls fell over me and kissed me for this deed. Next to it I remember to the east of the house where under the shady peepul trees and a gurgling fountain, an elephant was stationed. The mahout was a kind man and I had an innate love and admiration for the majestic animal even at that age. I used to scramble there and the mahout used to put me to sleep near the elephant which sometimes used to fan me with a twig of leaves. probably it was eating them but in my own way I thought it took a fancy to me and was keeping me cool. My sister used to rush up when it was meal time and with some words of authority take me back -the erring child to the house- and admonish me. i did not like to part with the company of my huge friend and I imagined it also did not like this separation. Somehow during that age, the chiming of church bells -the church being situated behind the house  vaguely attracted me. (This church today is known as St George Church Refer chapter 3 for my notes-Ed).   Many a time I had wandered into the church  and sat in the pew and closed my eyes kneeling imagining that I was praying with the rest. The service as in English and I could lisp the Lord's prayer with them ending with a loud "Amen". This visit was always kept up and I longed to be in the church until the doors were closed. from here also I had to be ferreted out by my sister who always kept me in her sight. 

One other feat in which I indulged was in getting immersed up to the neck in a vessel in which water and rice wash used to be poured. I thought it was a pleasant thing to do. One day I escaped scalding when an old woman -my mother's aunt-fondly called Ammalu athai came to pout the "canji"  after cooking rice. (probably, after the demise of his mother Ammalu Athai was looking after the children and the house-Ed). On seeing me emerge from the cistern, she began to weep I know not why and gather me in her arms and from then on I did not favour my bath as advised by her.

One thing influenced me deeply during that age. Just near by my house a dramatic troupe used to give performances. I was not of an age to understand what it was all about and I was too inarticulate to register a wish with my sister to take me there. But during the night hours, i glided upstairs and was squatting therre to hear the music which was wafted on the air from the theatre. it pleased me and I used to sit hours on end and hear the music and the talk. I later learnt that the voice was that of one Anantanarayanan who used to take female roles. This probably gave me a longing for flaunting tunes and I used to shed tears without knowing what it was all about.

It is not reported and I also do not remember if I was a mischievous child. Except for throwing some vessels in the well (!!!-Ed) and saying it was "Paddhe on satte" (I am not clear what the words mean probably some childish code word-Ed). I do not remember to have been questioned or punished for any childish offences.With none particularly to fondle me, I became moody and melancholy from the start. My father was too big and fearful gazes at him, I was not given much of his company. He used to arrive for his meal from somewhere in a coach along with one gentleman called Shri P Narayana Iyer, a Vakil of standing at Madurai. He used to pat me on my head and smile and I liked it though not patronising in any quarter. My father used to rush away after a hurried meal and I could have his darshan only the next day. being bereft of children of equal age to play with, my time was mine to mope. at this far distant date, I am unable to remember what all passed in my mind but I can only say that my attitude to life ought to have been very indifferent and I was not joyful and happy as I later I understood what these two words mean. With a flowing luxurious hair, and dressed up by my sister, I ought to have looked "chic:. for none who met us frowned on em or disliked my presence or wanted me away.

The kind pastor of the church slowly drew me to him and before I could learn any other script, I was tutored easily in English and could read the alphabets and read a line or two in the Bible. And the first present in my life was St John's Gospel (Ref 1) bound in red leather with gilded words in the front. This is what I gained on the first two years after the passing away of which it did not impress me.  (Ref 2)    

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Editor's note: 
1. St John's Gospel written by the disciple (John , the evangelist and the disciple whom Jesus loved) occupies an important place in the gospels of christianity. It is an account of the life of Jesus including the miracles he did. Many parts were written around 100 AD and it establishes Jesus as the incarnation of God. Detailed descriptions of the events connected with the life of Jesus can be found in the gospel.  
2. Though it is written in the concluding paragraph as the "first two years", from the incidents mentioned about the church, his memory about walking to school and singing drama tunes, it  could appear to some that my grandfather's  age may be actually more than two and near about 4.  He confirms this age later in his autobiography when he revisits his house.
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